Sunday, 25 October 2015

Hide and Seek

I have a few interesting discussions with the people I milk with, and tonight we somewhat touched on depression. So I thought, I would write about what I think it is and what I think about it as a whole.

To me, it's one of those things that is completely misunderstood. Nobody really gets it, everyone experiences it differently and commonly I see it being perceived as a form of weakness. It's like when someone has something such as, say, Autism. You'll get the people who can mold their thoughts and plans around it, accept it. Then there are the others who look on, a slight frown on their face as they see the person. They don't completely understand it, therefore intentionally or unintentionally, you get a bit of judgement happening.
And that's OK, everyone is different in the way they think, everyone is entitled to their own opinion - so long as you're careful with it though, I guess.

I see it as a disease. One as prominent in todays society almost as much as cancer is. But the thing is, people struggle to accept and believe something they can't see. We know that it's being shared around all the social medias, perhaps in the attempt to encourage people to talk about it, to encourage those affected by it personally to share their stories, to share to the non-believers I guess you could call them, that it is, in fact, "real" and something that people shouldn't be ashamed or scared of.

However, at the same time I do think that it is being taken out of proportion in some aspects. Commonly on a daily basis I see friends in my social networks claiming they must be "depressed'' and this and that. I sort of want to shake them and say, 'you've had ONE bad day, it's not the end of the world - take it easy.'
Sure, people are entitled to their bad days, to feel a little low every so often. In my opinion they're more than welcome to throw their hands in the air and say how much they hate their life, so long as after that they rip the page from the book, walk away and start afresh. That's life. That's what is allowed to happen in this big, scary world we all call home.

But in most cases, it's the people who are quiet that you have to look at more closely. Those are the people who are truly affected. Every so often the person may accidentally drop a hint or two, but nobody sees it. Because this person has been so good at hiding it for such a long time, that eventually to the outside world it appears to become what and who they are. Everyone just looks past it, because to them it has become the new normal.
I've mentioned it a few times, but one of our youth groups trips to HM Rage spoke a lot about hide and seek, about the masks that people put on. Some people put on so many masks all on top of eachother. It gets so bad that it just becomes them and no-one knows any differently.

To me, the important thing is to share it around, to talk about it. Not make it out to be some form of dangerous "no-go zone" topic. But also not converse about it in such a way so that the people who are actually suffering get forgotten about in the wake of the rest of the population talking about "issues" they have which must be linked to depression, (when really they've just run out of money so they can't go and buy that thing they always wanted, so spout off about it online. #depression. #peacesign.) You know?
I understand that there are different stages, different levels, and nothing is concrete when we're talking about the inner mind and emotions. There are many different reasons behind the cause, it's different for everyone. I guess the best part is to just stop, listen. Try your best to understand - even though we all know that that is the hardest part.
Because, let's face it (and I'm going to take one of my favourite quotes from one of my favourite books here) "you don't really understand a person until you consider things from his point of view....until you climb into his skin and walk around in it" - To Kill A Mockingbird.


  1. Interesting.
    I think the Doug Avery story is an example of "real" depression. And I think there's a big difference between depression and feeling depressed. Feeling depressed, that's because your money ran out. Depression, that's what kills, and the moment its spoken about, everything gets really, really quiet, then someone starts a totally new topic...

    Funny that you see it as a disease, though. I dunno, I wouldn't disagree, but I'd never kinda looked at it like that. Although I do think it can be contagious, so... Yeah, an interesting post though.

    1. I don't think I've heard the Doug Avery story, but I've heard of it. Exactly, everyone starts a new topic - that's the issue, isn't it?

      hmm yeah everyone thinks of things differently.

    2. I generally feel broke when my money runs out ;-) but then haven't really had that problem for a long time. On a serious note as in Depression, capital D and all that, yeah its something I have "suffered" with for a long time, I have my good spells like right now and have the times where I feel suffocated with low self worth and lack of life options. To me it is a disease, I personally have chosen not to medicate for it, but try to develop tools as in implementing different thought patterns to break the cycle of depression that I get into.

    3. It isn't all that great running low on cash, I agree ;)

      How does using the thought patterns work for you? Does it work ok most of the time?

    4. Generally my thought patterns try to remind me of my self worth and that even though to me what is happening is bad etc I do have it "pretty sweet" compared to a lot of people. Between that and thinking of things people who have influenced my life have
      said it works most of the time, not always the first time. Being able to chat freely and anonymously online helps to.

    5. I'm glad your hanging out with us helps a bit, I have to agree and it's quite nice having you around :)